Staying Out Of The Excuse Swamp

In my consulting practice, I often hear supervisors lamenting over the lack of accountability displayed by those in their charge. Excuses are numerous, and a sense of responsibility seems in short supply.

My 16 year-old might fall into this category. I would love nothing more than for him to wake up on Saturday morning, whistle while he grabs breakfast and head out to mow the lawn. How pleasant our lives would be. Instead, it usually goes something like this:

Friday afternoon
"Jack, I need you to mow the lawn before the weekend."
"Ok, Mom, I'm really tired right now and need to take a nap. I'll do it later."

Friday evening
"Jack, I just pulled in the driveway and the lawn is not mowed."
"Yeah, Pat came over and we played Xbox. I will do it tonight."
"No, you won't. It is getting dark now."
"I'll do it tomorrow morning. What's the big deal?"

Saturday morning
"It's 10 am and you have to mow the lawn before you go to work. Get up."
"Mooooommm, (as he puts the pillow over his head), I'll do it after work. I only work until 4."

And on an on it goes. The end result? Monday morning. Raining. Lawn still not mowed. Mama is not happy. As a matter of fact, Mama is really, really mad. I feel taken advantage of, my son has not lived up to his responsibility and has proven that he will not be accountable on his own, so now there must be a confrontation and potentially, consequences.

How do you keep from being dragged into the "excuse swamp"?

When addressing performance issues, try the following:

State the issue. Do not add opinion or blame.
"One of your jobs as a member of this household is to mow the lawn on a weekly basis. This has not happened of your own initiative, and this week, it did not happen at all."

("Your conversion ratio is 17.5% averaged for the last three months. The expectation is 30%.")

Ask a Future oriented, neutral question
This is where, arms crossed in a defensive posture, we will usually say something like this, "What do you have to say for yourself?" Do not do this! This is a question that looks backward and forces the employee to defend themselves, usually through excuses.
It is what it is. Start thinking future behavior.

"How can we ensure you mow the lawn by Saturday morning?"
("How can we increase your sales conversion ratio?")

Here's where the excuses might start.
My son might say, "I'll quit my job and have no social life."
(Your leasing professional might say, "Drop the price by $100.")
You know that may not be possible, and you might want very much at this point to blow up, roll your eyes or bite back. Don't. Honor it.
"That is one way. How else?"
"Which ideas can we realistically implement to get back on track?"

Reinforce any useful suggestions made. Keep coming back with what or how questions until excuses stop and conversation moves to goals.

Then, close the deal. Get the commitment.
"I think we have agreed that you have not been living up to the expectations we have of you as a family member, and to make sure the lawn is mowed weekly we are going to set a time and day at the beginning of each week that is agreeable to all that you commit to mowing the lawn."

"I think we have agreed that you don’t have the conversion ratio that is expected, and to increase sales, you are going to increase follow through efforts to two hours per day and up outreach efforts by 2 hours per week."

Arrange a time to meet again.
"In 2 weeks on Sunday, we will talk about how this method is working. If you need any help, let me know."

“Let’s review your progress in 2 weeks to see how it is working. If you need any help, let me know."

Make sure to provide feedback and reinforce any improvement. It is as much about changing your behaviors as theirs. Remember, you teach people how to treat you.

The lawn was mowed this week, and though we wavered on the hour, it got done before the weekend. I thanked my son and told him how much it meant to me to be able to enjoy the backyard during the weekend. One week down, one to go...